


Desperation

by LeedlingwithRageHappy



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF, Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Angst, Attack on Titan AU, Friendship, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-23
Updated: 2014-01-23
Packaged: 2018-01-08 12:28:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,425
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1132652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeedlingwithRageHappy/pseuds/LeedlingwithRageHappy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The one time Michael realizes his yelling won't change a thing</p>
            </blockquote>





	Desperation

**Author's Note:**

> You don't really need to know much about AoT to read this story, but if there's anything that confuses you, just let me know. Also, Team Gents don't really know Team Lads at this time, so there is an emotional disconnection between the two groups...  
> I noticed this fic becomes sadder if you listen to Coming Home - Part 2 by Skylar Grey

A scream echoed through the village and Michael’s blood went cold. Quickly looking around at his teammates, Michael realized Lindsay wasn’t there and he cursed himself. Without explaining to his fellow comrades, Michael shot off across the rooftops, praying he would reach her in time. His eyesight became red with fury and he barely noticed the sound of other maneuver gear on all sides of him.

“Right behind you, Michael!” Ray yelled from his left.

Michael calmed his rage down enough to grin and checked his right to see Gavin, Caleb, and JJ in his peripheral vision. The team sped off and soon enough, shapes of titans began to appear between and above the houses. Letting out a yell, Michael whipped out his blades and attacked the nearest titan while the rest of the group set off to destroy the others. In a fit of blind anger, Michael struck everything in his path, ignoring the fact that he was using too much gas until he fell heavily on a rooftop, his gear stuck in the wall of a building while one wire hanged loosely. 

“Lindsay!” he screamed and scrambled to his feet, searching around frantically. 

“Michael! Up here!”

Michael looked towards the voice and saw Lindsay on a neighboring roof surrounded by his comrades. Ripping out his gear from the wall, Michael leapt to the nearest building and made his way over to the rooftop that everyone was on. Once on the same house as Lindsay, Michael reached out and engulfed the girl in a bone-crushing hug.

“You’re so stupid.” Michael’s voice cracked and he squeezed her tighter. “Why did you say you were right behind me?”

Lindsay said nothing and weakly hugged Michael back. Not needing an answer from her, Michael pulled away and looked around at his comrades. All looked fine, except for-

“Ray, what’s wrong?” Michael asked, concerned. 

Ray shakily straightened up and gave a not-so-convincing smile. “N-nothing,” he said quietly before collapsing onto his knees.

“What the fuck, man?” Michael rushed over and grabbed Ray’s shoulders. “Look at me!”

Reluctantly, Ray lifted his head and Michael saw blood coming out of the corner of Ray’s mouth. “…Guess I got a little cocky.” Ray attempted to laugh, which soon turned into fits of coughing. 

Michael looked down and saw Ray’s arm covering his stomach. “Get a medic! NOW!” 

All stood in silence before JJ and Caleb jumped off the roof, their gear sounding as they raced away. Gently, Michael tugged away Ray’s arm and saw blood seeping through the fabric of Ray’s shirt.

“Fuck, Ray, what did you do?” Michael lowered his tone and glared at his friend. “You’re an idiot sometimes, you know that?”

Ignoring Michael, Ray looked to Lindsay. “You okay?” he breathed out.

Lindsay nodded shortly and opened her mouth to say something but Ray interrupted her.

“That’s all that matters then.”

“Ray…what are you saying?” Lindsay whispered, tears forming in the corner of her eyes. 

The Puerto Rican winced as he coughed again. “Shit. I don’t think the medics will make it here in time.”

“Shut the fuck up, Ray,” Michael growled and tore off his cape, pressing it to Ray’s stomach. “You’re going to be just fine.”

Ray shook his head and met Michael’s eyes. “You take care of Gavin and Lindsay, alright? You’ll all need each other to survive, Caleb and JJ included.”

“Stop talking. Just stop talking.”

Ray let out a sigh and placed his forehead against Michael’s, taking the other man’s hand in his own. “Promise me, Michael.”

“I-“ Michael swallowed and stared at Ray’s closed eyes. “Fuck, yes, I promise!” he replied, quick and frantic.

Michael squeezed his eyes shut and forced back the tears that threatened to come, mumbling words of reassurance to the other man. A heavy sigh came from Ray and Michael felt the warmth of his friend’s hand disappear. Snapping his eyes open, he grabbed Ray’s shoulders.

“Ray.” He shook his friend but Ray only moved around in his hands limply. “Ray,” Michael said louder and began shaking furiously.

“M-michael,” he heard Lindsay speak softly and felt her place a hand on his shoulder.

“No, no, no. God damn it, don’t do this to me, Ray!” Michael shook his friend around. “YOU SON OF A BITCH!” he screamed. “WAKE UP!”

“Michael, stop it!” Gavin’s strangled yell hit his ears and Michael froze, his eyes wide and panicked as he felt the stream of hot tears fall down his face. As if on instinct, Michael hugged Ray close to him, intent on never letting go.

“Ray, please,” Michael begged quietly. “Please wake up.”

Oblivious to the sound of gear around them, Michael gripped Ray tightly until he felt a tug. He reluctantly pulled back and in his blurred vision, Michael could see Ray’s face, peaceful, like he was only asleep. Then, he saw his friend being pulled away from him.

“STOP!” Michael scrambled to reach out but hands held him back. “RAY!” 

Michael began shouting his friend’s name over and over, fighting against the hold until darkness took over his mind.

~

When Michael woke, he found himself in the back of a wagon. Sitting up quickly, he stared around wide-eyed, seeing cottages pass by and the broken looks of his comrades in the wagon with him. Memories flashed in his mind and Michael’s head and shoulders dropped.

“He’s dead, isn’t he?” he deadpanned lowly. No reply came, but that was all the answer Michael needed. Tears formed at the corners of his eyes and he harshly wiped them away. 

There was no conversation the entire way back to base and Michael jumped out of the wagon as quickly as he could once they returned. Around him, he could hear the concerned voices of parents asking about those who had gone on the mission. Some were followed by sighs of relief while others were cries of anguish. As he made his way past the wagons, a hand on his arm stopped him and Michael went to rip his arm away until he saw familiar black hair.

“Michael,” the woman hesitantly looked up at him. “I don’t see Ray with you. Is he alright?”

Michael froze and he stared down at the woman, unable to answer her. The wagon of the dead pulled up and the first corpse unclothed revealed his fears. The woman screamed and grabbed Ray from the arms of the soldiers carrying him, falling to her knees while holding his body close to her. Michael watched Ray’s arm hang limply behind him as the woman sobbed into his chest and he swallowed.

~

_“Hey, Michael.”_

_Michael was shaken from his thoughts and looked at his friend on the horse next to him._

_“What’s up, Ray?”_

_“I was thinking,” Ray began softly. “I haven’t seen my mom in a while. After this mission is over, I’d like to go visit her. I was wondering if you’d want to come with.”_

_Though he’d never admit it, Michael was touched by this gesture and he covered it by shrugging nonchalantly. “Yeah, why not?” he grinned. “Let’s go see your mom, Ray!”_

~

Michael clenched his fists as the memory came back into his mind, the cries from Ray’s mother echoing in his ears. Everything else faded into the background and Michael could only watch, unable to console his friend’s mother. He saw his own desperation as she held the corpse and soon, the tears began falling from his eyes.

“Michael.”

Michael’s head snapped up and he looked to his side, seeing Gavin stare at the same scene. Though Gavin had his head slightly turned away from him, Michael could see tears streaming down his friend’s face.

“You said you’d wipe out every titan in existence, didn’t you?” The tone in Gavin’s voice was hollow and so unfamiliar to Michael’s ears that it almost scared him. 

Hesitantly, Michael nodded and held his breath.

Gavin turned his head sharply towards Michael and the man could finally see the pain in the Brit’s eyes. “Then let’s do exactly what you said. For Ray’s sake.”

Michael had never seen such fury from Gavin before and he felt a new fire start within him. “For Ray,” he repeated back and the two friends stared at each other, making their silent vows.

From a distance, the team leaders watched the scene with concern and Jack shook his head. “That mentality will get them into trouble some day.”

Geoff shrugged and let out a sigh. “Probably. But with the way things are going, maybe it’s just the mentality we need.”

**Author's Note:**

> Oh man...I apologize for this one. It had been sticking in my mind for weeks and I had to jot it down. I may write a before and after part to this since the ideas are slowly coming, but we'll see ;P
> 
> Also, I'd really really REALLY love if someone could draw a couple of scenes from this. I had ideas to make this into a graphic novel of sorts, but that's waaay beyond my level of drawing. Y'all have my permission to take drawing prompts from this if you so wish ^^


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